5:00 am in the morning I felt back pain and mild cramping! And I knew.....CD1 is coming. I am so bummed. Another month....I am actually surprised. Even though I was told not to TTC...I did anyhow. Really did....like almost ever fertile day. So...what does that mean??
And Dr. T has not called me back yet...and I hate to be a pest so I guess I will just wait some more..
So, I told myself if I was not pregnant I was going to start the Master Cleanse...(thanks to dear Sew for introducing me to the detox that I have now become obsessed with...). I am starting on Monday. I have recruited my daughter to join me! Not sure if a 17 year old needs a detox...but she knew more about it than me. So, I have the lemons and the cayenne pepper. I need to get pure unrefined maple syrup and Celtic sea salt and the laxative tea. I have decided to alternate with the salt and tea. I have read a few "Master Cleanse Diaries"....and the salt part is still freaking me. So, I thoiught every other day might be better.
Here is what I am trying to get out of it:
1- More energy 2- Balanced hormones 3- Joint pain to go away 4- And a loss of 5 pounds would be nice!!
Here is the schedule I came up with:
Day 1: Raw Fruits and Veggies (Ease In) Day 2: Fruit and Veggie Juice (Ease In) Day 3: Orange Juice (Ease In) Day 4: Lemonade and Laxative Tea (Cleanse) Day 5: Lemonade and Sea Salt Drink (Cleanse) Day 6: Lemonade and Laxative Tea (Cleanse) Day 7: Lemonade and Sea Salt Drink (Cleanse) Day 8: Lemonade and Laxative Tea(Cleanse) Day 9: Lemonade and Sea Salt Drink (Cleanse) Day 10: Lemonade and Laxative Tea(Cleanse) Day 11: Lemonade and Sea Salt Drink (Cleanse) Day 12: Lemonade and Laxative Tea(Cleanse) Day 13: Lemonade and Sea Salt Drink (Cleanse) Day 14: Orange Juice(Ease Out)-3 1liter OJ w/ 2 Tablespoons MS Day 15: Fruit and Veggie Juice (Ease Out) or Broth Day 16: Raw Fruits and Veggies (Ease Out)
This is the type of dress that I would love to wear everyday! The June Cleaver eyelet vintage dress. Everything about it I just adore. The longer sleeves, the full skirt...the collar! And to think that woman had closets full of these day dresses. I wonder if they thought at the time that there could possible be a more comfortable way to dress....like my day to day outfit...sweats, a t-shirt, and Phillies baseball hat. What would these women think of my get-up???
Anyhow, this dress was on sale at Etsy. But, someone already snatched it up. It was posted on one of my favorite blogs: Design Sponge....and some lucky lady will be sporting this dress. The waist is 25 inches!!
Waiting for Dr. T to call me back and give me my P+7 numbers....the nurse would not give me these "highly confidential" numbers...I suppose! Now I am curious........but it is 5:00 and I am sure Dr. T has left the office.
Forgot again to call Dr. T for my P+7 results. Since she didn't call me..I am guessing they are okay. At this moment I am wrapping a string around my finger so I don't forget tomorrow!
I ran out of my "cheap" prenatal vitamins...so I had to dig into my husband's medicine drawer (he keeps all of my (fertility) drugs! ..ha!) and take one of the expensive ones I was taking when I was pregnant. They taste so much better than the cheap ones. So, I think I am going to keep taking them until CD1..and then I'll go out and buy the cheap ones again.
Happy Saturday! I have finished my cleaning chores...so I thought I'd write. First, above is a picture of my Miscarriage Mug...My dear friend was shopping at Anthropologie when I told her about my miscarriage..so she bought me a gift! Isn't that sweet! And it is all mine, because no one in the house has a name that begins with "J"...and you thought my name was Hannah...ha!
Anyhow, here is the scoop on the tampons...
1- If you use Napro, you really are told not to use tampons. You can not get a accurate reading of CM at the end of your period if a tampon is sucking it up.
2- After my miscarriage, the thought of sticking anything into my body seemed so repulsive...that I swore I was not using them anymore. My first period without them was crazy because for the first time in 25 years I actually noticed how much I bled. I was at a funeral and I had to stand in the back of the Church because I was afraid of leaking.
3- I really think they effect fertility...I found this article below that gives a better reason as to why tampons are not good for you.
Tampons contain two things that are potentially harmful: Rayon (for absorbency),and dioxin (a chemical used in bleaching the products). The tampon industry is convinced that we, as women, need bleached white products in order to view the product as pure and clean. The problem here is that the dioxin produced in this bleaching process can lead to very harmful problems for a woman. Dioxin is potentially carcinogenic (cancer-associated) and is toxic to the immune and reproductive systems. It has also been linked to endometriosis and lower sperm counts for men. For both sexes, it breaks down the immune system. The real danger comes from repeated contact (Karen Couppert "Pulling the Plug on the Tampon Industry"). I'd say using about 4-5 tampons a day, five days a month, for 38 menstruating years is "repeated contact", wouldn't you? Rayon contributes to the danger of tampons and dioxin because it is a highly absorbent substance. Therefore, when fibers from the tampons are left behind in the vagina (as usually occurs), it creates a breeding ground for the dioxin. It also stays in a lot longer than it would with just cotton tampons. This is also the reason why TSS (toxic shock syndrome) occurs.
Well...I don't have them. All day long I was trying to remember to call Dr. T and get my P+7 progesterone results from the blood I gave yesterday...and I forgot! Unfortunately, it is Friday and I will not be able to call until Monday. Bummero!!
Today, I am CD22...When you are trying to conceive your month is formulated into 3 segments:
1- Period (Ugh) 2- Fertile Time 3- Waiting....
So...I am waiting. the waiting period is also the time that I try not to drink. Just in case I am pregnant I don't want to be sorry later. It is not like I am a booze hound...I just like my glass of wine with dinner or while I am cooking pasta. It just dosen't seem right to be cooking Italian without my wine glass. My favorite was Monkey Bay this Summer..a white!
So I am about 8 days away to a Pregnancy Test or Always Mini Pads....Have I told you that I am not using tampons anymore???
My next post will tell you why I am now anti-tampon!!!!
You know it's Fall when the Ivins' appear on the shelves at the grocery store. So, I bought some!! I love to dip them in milk...ummm ummm good!
I was cooking dinner tonight with olive oil and it always amazes me that this stuff is made from olives. I love olive oil...but, I can't stand olives (unless in a martini)...the smell...the taste...ugh! Anyway, I could super smell the olives tonight...and I thought, "Maybe I'm pregnant!!"....Ha! Funny how you look for any little sign that you might be pregnant. I am only P+5...so that idea is totally ridiculous. But, it is nice to imagine!
So...I decided to wipe the 10K from my head...and my chart! It never happened! Ha! And I took the oral progesterone this morning. So I made today P+4 and I will give blood on Thursday. I will be taking the oral progesterone until P+12. So, I believe I am out of fertile phase and I will now have to wait and see if anything great has happened!! Even though I was told to wait...
So...my temp tattoo that was suppose to last for 3 weeks has already disappeared! Which is probably a good thing! It started a fight with my hubby on the way home from the party anyhow. I was going off on how I believe women should not have tattoos (sorry for anyone who does...). I don't think Mother Mary would get a tattoo and plus what out there is so sacred and wonderful that you would have it permanently plastered on your body. My hubby has a tattoo (which I am not fond of....)...so he was probably taking it personally....but I was talking about girls!!
The 40th Birthday Parties have begun. This is the year my friends and I all turn 40! Ugh! I don't even like saying it. So, last night started off with a Spaghetti Dinner thrown by the parents of a friend. It was great fun! They had a temp tattoo artist there for us and 80's Karaoke. I was laughing so hard..everyone was in rare form and I got a Chinese letter on my back that represent "life"...it should fade in 3 weeks!
My birthday is November 29th...if I am not pregnant before that date..I am going to freak!!! Which bring me to my weird Creighton chart. If anyone has insight..please do tell!
CD 11: 6K CD 12: 6K CD 13: 0AD CD 14: 2 x1 CD 15: 10KL x1 CD 16: 2 x2 CD 17: 0 AD
And today I saw 10KL.....WTH!!! I am suppose to start taking my oral progesterone on P+3..which would be today if I did not see 10KL...so does that mean I have not ovualted yet or had my peak day?? And if I take the progesterone, what will it do to me if I have not ovulated yet??
Had two Back to School Nights in a row. How I wish I could go back to school. I either need to teach again or go back to school for something!
Made it home in time to watch Glee. I know...I know..I should not be watching this show. The pilot was good clean fun...but now..it seems to get a bit raunchier week by week. I just can't tear myself away from a bunch of misfits who sing in the glee club. I was a "play geek"...a popular one...ha!!
On the baby making front: Is the 10kl ever going to come??? I was 6k and then 6k and now NOTHING!! I am downing these Mucinex like skittles! This is really annoying...there is no way to just bring it on. And I know it is the KEY to knowing when you are ovulating. Maybe I'm not.
Back to watching FOX News and these crazy ACORN videos.
My daughter's birthday party is over and it was a success. The cake took 5 hours to make...and I told her I was never making it again! I will post a picture as soon as I download. I was happy with it...and so were my 14 nieces and nephews who got a kick out of the rainbow colors. I had to make the icing 3 times because it was not catching. Meringue is tough! You have to beat the egg whites and sugar just right...
I started taking the Mucinex, about 2 days ago...I don't know what is wrong with me, but I am having a really hard time swallowing these vitamins and such! I seriously look at them and want to puke...especially the B6. When I was pregnant I was given prenatal vitamins that smelled like flowers and they tasted good. But, they were very expensive...so I am saving them for when (if) I get pregnant again. So, now I am taking the cheapies....
I found that I can swallow them with coke.
I have 6K CM today....I could be starting my fertile time. Dr. T asked us to avoid until the next cycle....
I love my doctor (Dr. T). She is adorable and so holy. I mean really holy. There is a picture of Mary in every room. Every time I call her she needs to whisper to me that she is in Church and needs to call me back. She sang Happy Birthday to Mary as soon as I came in for my appointment this morning at 8:00. She was praying for me that morning at daily Mass. I don't care if she knows NOT one thing about medicine....she loves Mary and that is all that matters.
So...good news...but I wanted HCG!!! It seems that my progesterone levels are now normal. So normal that I do not need to get the HCG shots anymore. I know this might sound crazy...but I am disappointed. You see, I got pregnant the month after I started the shots. So, in my head...HCG equals baby. My husband says it is all in my head....and he is probably right! (I told him I was going to use the left over HCG in the fridge....it is like I am going through withdrawl...he thinks I'm crazy.)
Instead I was given a prescription for oral progesterone to take from P+3 through P+7 to support a pregnancy if one occurs. Dr. T also told us to wait one month to ttc...bummer!
This is the cake (if you want the recipe) I am baking for my daughter's birthday party on Saturday. It looks so good...I can't stand it! I hope that I can make it look just like that one.
Well, that is what my Napro Practitioner has coined it. I suppose since I had a child 17 years ago today and now am having a difficult time conceiving...sub-fertile is what you would call it. A close priest friend of mine thought that my scenario was quite ironic. When I didn’t want to get pregnant God gave me a child...and now that I do want to get pregnant...it’s not happening. God works in mysterious ways. I was like..yeah.. pretty funny, huh?
So, I am now CD1..finally. I feel like it has taken a few days. Before I started messing with my cycle, I was 28 days by the clock. I am starting to miss my more regimented body. Give me a baby...or let me go back to my 28 day cycle!! Psychologically, I am starting to think it is menopause coming on. And that to me is the kiss of death! I get extremely anxious when I start hearing about menopause. First off...there is no “pausing”...it is flat out “stopping”. It is the end of fertility..
Here are my encounters with menopause:
1- My Mom laughing w/ her girlfriends about heat-flashes....and my Mom fan herself years ago. I found this all quite annoying...
2- About 2 years ago I was having a yard sale with my Mom and sister and I mentioned to my Mom that I was tired. And she says: “Maybe it is menopause..you know your Aunt Joan started at age 35.” I didn’t need to know that....
3- Menopause commercials on the radio....listing horrible side effects. I turn the dial immediately!
4- Just this past weekend a friend of my husband’s is about 42...and she was telling me how bad her period was this month and told me it was “the change” coming on... At that I put my fingers in my ears and said "I can't hear you..I can't hear you"...I wanted to run to the hills! 42??? That is too young!!! Doesn’t it start at 70???
5- And lastly, (another Mother story) I was telling my Mom about how heavy my period was after the miscarriage (like two cups of blood in one hour heavy in the middle of a funeral Mass). And she says: “Maybe it is menopause.” Wha???? Again..why are you saying that to your daughter who is trying to get pregnant???? I love my Mom, but sometimes she does not think!!!
This week I am watching my Sister's 4 children plus my stepdaughter. So I have 5! They are all coloring right now...so I thought I would take a moment to write.
This week has been a bit hectic with school starting for my 17 year old. Her birthday is also this week...so needless to say the first week of September is ALWAYS crazy. I figure I need to get pregnant during the months of October and November to avoid this problem again. Speaking of which, I am expecting my period any minute...any second! I have not been feeling like myself, so I am surprised that it has not come yet.
This is lame...but I really hope I am not pregnant! I have had so much paint, caulk, and wood dust up my nose the past week...nothing could live in this body!! In June when I was pregnant, I started caulking our porch and then I read the horrible warnings on the container!! I immediately stopped and got out of doing any more work...
A quick rant while I am sitting here with the kids coloring and watching The Disney Channel! I can not stand Nickelodeon or The Disney Channel!! Honestly, this stuff is NOT appropriate for children. The kids on these shows all scream...they are disrespectful to adults, and the themes are always about dating. 8 year olds should not be worrying about dating....If and when I have any more children....I am getting rid of cable!
Tonight: Birthday dinner of clams, scallops and salad...daughter does not eat meat!!